


Made to Love

by Mari_Gold



Category: No Fandom, Original Work
Genre: Character Death, F/M, How Do I Tag, Infertility, One Shot, Sad, Short, Short One Shot, Sort Of, Tags Are Hard, they try to have kids, you'll see - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-03
Updated: 2019-03-03
Packaged: 2019-11-08 15:24:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 713
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17983673
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mari_Gold/pseuds/Mari_Gold
Summary: They’ve been trying so hard. Every night is no longer one of pleasure, but one of desperation. They cling to each other as if their life depends on it, and they wake up to sticky bedsheets. Every morning, she hopes that it’s happened, that she’ll have hosted a new life inside her. The hope builds inside her, a golden bubble that she’s afraid to touch for fear that it’ll pop. Every month, at her checkup, the bubble is flattened by a sledgehammer.





	Made to Love

They’ve been trying so hard. Every night is no longer one of pleasure, but one of desperation. They cling to each other as if their life depends on it, and they wake up to sticky bedsheets. Every morning, she hopes that it’s happened, that she’ll have hosted a new life inside her. The hope builds inside her, a golden bubble that she’s afraid to touch for fear that it’ll pop. Every month, at her checkup, the bubble is flattened by a sledgehammer.

~*~

They move. The whispers of their neighbors become too much, and the pity is suffocating. He can’t stand it, so when he gets a job offer in another state, he doesn’t hesitate to take it. She’s downcast, face shadowed as she leaves their house, the one that they’ve been saving up for since college, the one that they’ve lived in for years and built so many memories in.

Privately, he thinks it’s a good thing. A new slate. No more being the couple that can’t bear children. Maybe, in the new town, their new home, they’ll get a stroke of luck. Maybe he’ll have the son he’s always wanted. Maybe their family can finally be whole.

~*~

It doesn’t happen.

~*~

Years pass. She begins to despair. She’s already at the age when childbirth can be lethal, and soon she’ll be infertile. She’s watched as all her friends hold happy, shining babes in their arms, watched those babies grow up into young men, women, and in one case, someone that fluctuates in between three genders. She doesn’t care what gender her child is. She knows her husband wants a son, but she doesn’t care. She’ll love them, even if they have no gender. She just wants a child to nurture and care for. She knows that her neighbors will say that her talents shouldn’t be wasted on having kids, but she only wonders why she can’t be successful and have children. It’s the one thing she’ll do anything for. Although she’s an atheist, she even begins praying. It doesn’t matter to her which god answers, she just hopes that one will.

~*~

Another year passes, and she wonders if she’s just not made to love.

~*~

Somehow, miraculously, it happens. They haven’t slept with each other in years, but one night they’re both drunk and heated and they stumble into bed together. They don’t think much about it, but when she misses her period two months in a row, they go to the doctor. The chances are low, but they check anyway, the ritual familiar. When the results are announced, they cry tears of joy. Against all odds, she bears a child — their child.

Two decades after they’d started hoping, it’s happened.

~*~

She gives birth to a boy. Both she and the child are healthy, which she’s thankful for. Holding her baby in her arms, she feels whole. The morning sickness, the judging looks she got from being pregnant when she’s well into her forties, the agony of pushing something the size of a watermelon out of her, all of it was worth it. The family she’s always wanted, the family she’s never been able to have now exists. She feels a sense of fulfillment, and she knows that as long as she has this, she’ll never need anything more.

~*~

He hasn’t seen the child yet, but he knows it’s a boy, and that both the child and mother are healthy. He’s never felt happier in his life, and that happiness only increases when he sees them. His wife, glowing as she holds the babe, and his son. The son that he’s never had, the son that he can now raise as his own. This, he feels, this is what he’s been living for. This very moment, when his family is finally together.

~*~

They receive the news at two in the morning. It was an accident. He was out with friends, and he got hit by a car. The headlights weren’t on. He wasn’t watching where he was going. She hangs the phone up, not wanting to hear more. A second passes. Her husband’s face is like stone. He ghosts into the other room. Once he’s out, she crumples and buries her face in her hands.

Some people, it seems, just weren’t made to love.

**Author's Note:**

> This was my first work on AO3, so constructive criticism would be appreciated.


End file.
